(You Know You Watch Too
Much Sailor Moon When)
You visit New York, and at first
glance you could have sworn that the Statue of Liberty was holding the
Moon scepter in her hand, instead of a torch.
Your family doesn't eat rice
anymore cause they're still picking it out of their hair from your last
"eat like Serena" experiment.
You start to wonder if Catsy
was ever a ballerina.
You replace all the pictures
of your family and friends in your wallet with sailor moon trading cards.
Whenever you see someone wearing
weird clothes, you say "Their fashion sense is way last season."
You take a trip to the North
Pole, not to find Santa, but to destroy the Negaverse.
You change the picture of the
Windows 95 Logo that starts up with Windows, into a picture of Sailor Moon
with a caption reading "Sailor Moon says, Windows 95 is now starting."
You set your computer up to
play the opening Sailor Moon theme song when it starts up.
You set your computer up to
play the ending Sailor Moon theme song when it shuts down.
You set your computer up to
play various Sailor Moon sounds for other functions. "Moon Scepter Elimination!"
closes a window. "Moon Crystal Power!" opens one. "Kitty Magic!" creates
a new folder or file.
You give up playing Solitaire,
for fear of the cards coming to life and draining your energy.
You have so many Sailor Moon
dolls on your bed, there's no room for you!
Everytime you throw a frisbee,
you shout "Moon Tiara Magic!"
You attempt to swat a fly that's
been buzzing around pestering you, but before you kill it, you say "In
the name of the moon, I'll punish you!"
You plan on opening up your
very own "Sailor Moon store". With various fashions and giftware relating
to the Sailor Scouts. And you ask the Sailor Moon voice actors, to sign
autographs at the grand opening.
You look for the nearest phonebooth,
to cry in, whenever you get dumped by your boyfriend.
You expect everyone who's named
'Amy', to have blue hair and an IQ over 300.
You sign up for America Online,
then proceed to create five different Screen Names for five different Sailors
You sign up for Hotmail and
then proceed to create five different login names for five different Sailor
The only reason you got internet
access, was to sign the SOS online petition.
You hope you are a Sailor scout
and Luna just hasn't found you yet.
You are afraid to use striped
pencils, for fear they are part of Neflite's plans.
Your car breaks down on the
way to work, and you tell your fellow car-poolers that you can all still
get there on time if they would just join hands in a circle and chant,
"Scout Power...". When they don't go for that, you wave the dipstick at
the car in an effort to "heal" it.
You start making a list of possible
names for more of Queen Beyrl's generals. Strobelite, Blacklite, Budlite...
You plan to someday have five
daugthers and name them... Serena, Amy, Raye, Lita, and Mina.
Anytime one of your friends
sees a Sailor Moon related item, they always think of you.
You call up a local radio station,
and ask them to play a song from the Sailor Moon CD.
You ask someone with the last
name of "Moon", if they would name their newborn daughter "Sailor", so
there would be a girl named Sailor Moon in real life.
While being given an ink blot
test, by a psychiatrist(that your parents are forcing you to see because
of your Sailor Moon fascination), You tell the psychiatrist that the ink
blots look like "A crescent moon, a rose, a temple, a floating ball that
looks like a cat, a tuxedo, a mask, a tiara..."
You ask Greg or Raye to find
out what tonight's winning lottery numbers will be.
While reading, your eyes start
playing tricks on you. Instead of seeing the name Lisa you see Lita, Nina
becomes Mina, Sheena becomes Serena.
You watch a tv test pattern
for an hour one morning, hoping that Sailor Moon will come on. Because
your local TV station moved Sailor Moon to a different time slot, and didn't
list the change in the TV guide.
You're more of a Moonie than
your sister, and she's in the target audience.
None of your friends will come
to your house anymore, for fear you'll force them to watch Sailor Moon.
You ask your florist, "Which
type of roses have the best aerodynamics?"
You build a swimming pool in
the shape of a crescent moon.
You have to listen to the Sailor
Moon CD, to be able to get to sleep.
You need to buy an engagement
ring, and you vow to only get it at the OSAP jewelry store.
You've tried to convert your
friends into Moonies, so many times that they now run away screaming, if
you say something even remotely like "Sailor..."
Every time you see a new Sailor
Moon item, you simply HAVE to buy it!
Whenever your mom complains
about your grades, your response is, "At least I'm doing better than Serena!"
You still think Zoycite is cute,
even after learning the truth!
You get angry when someone comes
up with a better YKYWTMSMW than you did.
You sent in so many YKYWTMSMW
suggestions, Starfox has a restraining order against you.
You fight with your friends
over who gets Darian.
The minute you walk into your
local comic store, the guy behind the counter tells you that he has new
Sailor Moon stuff in stock.
You can't get the Sailor Moon
soundtrack music, out of your head.
You spend hundreds of dollars
buying hair extensions so you can look like Serena.
You have rigged up your Windows95
desktop to look like this. (Note the name of the notebook file. You'd have
this there so you could easily cut and paste the name into the FIND option
in Nestscape. Which then allows you to easily pick up where you left off
reading this YKYWTMSMW page.)
You spend hours fiddling with
the earring on your right ear, hoping that a VR Visor will materialize
across your eyes.
Whenever you yell or cry, your
mouth takes up half your face.
You come home terribly late,
and instead of cutting your allowance or grounding you, your parents decide
on the ultimate punishment for you. NO SAILOR MOON FOR TWO WHOLE WEEKS!!!
You set up an SOS petition table
in your local mall.
You browse through your local
white-pages, looking for someone named "Amy Anderson".
You take your Sailor Moon CD
to Sears and slip it into one of the Stereos on display. And proceed to
play "Carry On" as loud as you can.
Your Algebra teacher sends you
to the Guidance Counselor because during a test she caught you trying to
contact Amy through your pink calculator.
You get a calm feeling of joy
and contentment every time you are seated in front of the TV and the Sailor
Moon theme starts.
You spend your time looking
for a new planet in the Solar System so you can name it and declare yourself
the Sailor Scout of that planet!
You sing the Sailor Moon Theme
song at assemblies, instead of your national anthem.
On a clear evening, you look
at the western horizon and say, "Hey, I can see Sailor Venus' planet from
You're playing your Sailor Moon
CD while reading this page.
You bought Doom II just so you
could play the Sailor Moon wad.
You catch yourself (or are caught)
whistling or singing "Fighting evil by moonlight..."
You keep trying to do up your
niece's hair like Serena's (much to the dismay of her parents).
Your teacher actually said something
like this to you. "OKAY!!, one more 'Sailor Moon' outta you, and I'm sending
you straight to the PRINCIPAL!"..... And there you went.
Your friends decide that because
you are nuts about Sailor Moon and that you are always on the net, that
they will nickname you Melvin!
You take a picture of one of
the Sailor Scouts to your hair stylist and say... "Make my hair look like
You don't associate with anyone
who thinks Sailor Moon is lame.
You give away your pet dog (which
you've had since he was just a puppy), because he used your Sailor Mercury
doll as a chew-toy.
You can't look at a squirrel
in a park without flinching.
You start dating one of the
Scouts... in your dreams.
You buy air time on a local
TV station and run your own advertisements for sailor Moon.
You run this YKYWTMSMW list
through your 'Print Preview' option and find out it's over 32 pages long,
but you go ahead and print it out anyway.
You find it odd when you see
a billboard written in English.
You actually admit to the sales
clerk, that the Sailor Moon dolls you're buying are for yourself, and not
a little sister or niece.
You are the only one in your
school who wants to wear school uniforms.
You paint Sailor Moon murals
on your bedroom walls.
You see a black cat in an alley
and you say to it, "Luna is that you?"
You ask the Bank of Japan if
Sailor Moon's picture will be seen on the new 1,000,000 yen note.
You keep a diary... not about
the events in your own life, but of Serena's life.
The famous jumping bus scene
from 'Speed' & 'Spy Hard' reminds you of the SM episode where Serena
takes a bus and ends up in another dimension.
For the upcoming new season
of 'Reboot', you hope to see Dot "rebooting" into a Sailor Scout.
When the doctor listens to your
heartbeat, he discovers it beats in rhythm to the Sailor Moon theme song.
You got mad when Sailor Mercury
decided to stay, because you already made one-way flight reservations to
Every bookmark in your web browser
is a Sailor Moon link.
Everyday you inform your friends
at work of the updated total number of signatures on the S.O.S. page.
You become so fascinated with
the moon, people start to think you're a werewolf.
You form your own addict support
group just for moonies. But, only succeed in getting every member of the
group even more hooked on the show.
While at the arcade you always
play the crane games, hoping to grab a Sailor Moon doll.
You watch a whole Sailor Moon
episode on tape, in slow motion, to see if there are any bits that you
couldn't see at normal speed.
You have arranged your sleep
patterns around the show.
You kept your friend on the
phone for nearly two hours, reading him the whole YKYWTMSMW list!
You tape a banana to a stick
and run around yelling "Moon Healing Activation!"
You run to your local supermarket
every week just to see if Darian and Serena's love life made it onto the
front pages of the tabloids.
You think all you need to survive
is to eat, sleep, and watch Sailor Moon. Then you think maybe eating and
sleeping aren't that important.
No magnifying glass in your
house is safe from your never-ending search for the perfect Crescent Moon
You have an office desk made
in the shape of a crescent moon.
You got kicked out of the Coca-Cola
bottling plant, because you kept asking when the Sailor Moon commemorative
bottles are coming out.
You see Wonder Woman's boots
and wonder if she shops at the same store as Sailor Moon.
You think that AC/DC's song
"ThunderStruck" is about Sailor Jupiter.
You start to cry whenever the
SOS web site releases bad news.
You're playing basketball, and
you suddenly bounce the ball really high and yell, "Luna Ball Kitty Magic!"
You make your own Sailor V game
You write Sony Television, asking
them to have a "Sailor Moon" category in Jeopardy. Or "Sailor Moon" as
a puzzle in Wheel of Fortune.
You offer your little sister's
friend 50 bucks for her Sailor Moon CD, after you've looked through every
store in your area in vain.
You freely admit that you have
a crush on one of the Scouts (or Darian).
In chemistry class, you add
pigtails to the water molecule so it will look like Serena's head.
You envy Mara for getting to
start everyday by checking e-mail for new YKYWTMSMW contributions.
Instead of sending your sick
friend a "Get Well" card, you send one that says: "Moon Healing Activation."
You wish Serena said this after
using the luna pen. "It just goes to show you that the Luna Pen is mightier
than the sword."
You hang out in front of florist
shops, hoping to see Darian.
You dye your little sister's
hair pink. Much to the dislike of your parents.
Everyday you put Miracle Grow
on your hair, in an attempt to get it long enough, that you too can have
a meatball head.
You ask your doctor if you can
have x-rays taken of yourself. In hopes of finding a Rainbow Crystal inside
You convert your whole soccer
team into Moonies, and suggest they rename the team to "The Soccer Scouts".
You rearrange the furniture
in your apartment so it looks like Darians apartment.
You get a safety deposit box,
at a bank, just to store your complete set of Sailor Moon trading cards.
You stick your hand in the air
and shout "Moon Prism Power!" to see if you'll transform into Sailor Moon.
You look up the person with
the longest hair in the world, in the guiness book of world records, and
contact them to suggest they put it up "Serena-style".
You practice doing the "sailor
moon says" laugh.
You hope to win a 40 million
dollar Lotto jackpot, so you can buy the rights to Sailor Moon, and get
more episodes translated.
You think Kerri Strug and Shannon
Miller would make great new Sailor Scouts!
Your friends want you to do
something "bad", so you quote the appropriate "Sailor Moon Says", word
for word (including the laugh), on why you shouldn't.
You spend all of your free time
thinking up YKYWTMSMW's.
You've converted more people
to Moonies than Rush Limbaugh has to Republicans.
You have a link to this YKYWTMSMW
page on your own homepage.
You make a bumper sticker that
reads: "I break for the Sailor Scouts!"
Whenever it's raining, you have
an uncontrollable urge to listen to "Rainy Day Man".
The only time you get off the
internet Sailor Moon web sites, is to watch the show itself.
Your newborn sister's first
words aren't "Mama", they're "Moon Prism Power!"
Your girlfriend is similar to
Serena in so many ways, it's scary. (And you love to be scared! :)
You send hate mail to the "Anti
Sailor Moon Page".
You insist that your boyfriend
dress and behave more like Tuxedo Mask.
You look up in the night sky,
and are shocked to learn that the moon actually has phases other than 'Crescent'!
You are on a never ending quest,
to collect every Sailor Moon picture on the internet.
You begin to see a lighter,
more positive side of Queen Beryl
You are purposely late for school
every day, in hopes of seeing Serena in detention.
You can't look at a plate of
spaghetti and meatballs without thinking about Sailor Moon.
You begin to wonder what the
guys in your class would look like in a tuxedo and a cape.
You call the annoying nerd in
your class, Melvin.
You brush your Sailor Scout
doll's hair more than you brush your own.
You try to make a floating Luna
Ball from a helium balloon.
You get a paper cut, but instead
of getting a bandaid, you instantly take out a pen and wave it around yelling
"Moon Healing Activation".
At any mention of karaoke, you
immediately start singing "Home On The Range", Ann style.
You become known as the 'Human
Sailor Moon Encyclopedia'.
You keep having thoughts that
Rapunzel was actually Princess Serena and the Prince was Prince Darian.
(Were they also re-born in medieval times?)
You unconsciously talk in Molly's
accent for long periods of time.
You take a sudden liking to
vanilla prune shakes.
You attempt to save enough money
to buy the local football stadium. So you can rename it the "Serena Arena".
You refuse to listen to 'Pink
Floyd' because you think that "The Dark Side of the Moon" has to be part
of a negaverse plot.
Sailor Moon is more important
to you, than even your family and friends.
You're parents call you 'meatball
head' whenever you're down, and you feel better within seconds.
You answer the phone with a
pleasant "Hidee Ho!", no matter who it happens to be.
During a thunderstorm you jump
on your trampoline as high as possible, while doing the appropriate hand
moves and shouting "Jupiter Thunder Crash"!
You try to suck up energy by
using a vacuum cleaner on your friends.
You are the only GUY in your
high school with a Sailor Moon backpack. And are proud of it!
On the first night you get your
new computer, you immediately log-on to the internet, and search out Sailor
Moon web sites, and stay on wayyyyy past 6 AM looking at ONLY Sailor Moon
You and a fellow Moonie friend,
spend hours arguing over the exact true color of Raye's hair.
You wrap your sandwich with
When you shut your computer
down you have it set up to say "Sailor Moon says, see ya!". AND you never
get bored of hearing it...
You propose some street names
in new housing development areas. e.g. Sailor Moon St., Avery Ave., Darian
Dr., Rini Rd., Lita Lane, Catsy Cres., Prism Place, Birdy Blvd., Tuxedo
You call every arcade in town,
and ask if Andrew is working tonight.
You just KNOW that all the flute
players in the school orchestra are aliens, with a Doom Tree in their house.
You can type "Sailor Moon" faster
than your own name!
You throw around ice cubes while
yelling "Mercury Ice Bubbles Freeze!".
You receive 200+ messages a
day from Sailor Moon mailing lists.
You SEND 200+ messages a day
to Sailor Moon mailing lists.
You order your friends and family
never to phone you, while Sailor Moon is on.
You look into a mirror and think
you see Sailor Moon.
You print up hundreds of SOS
fliers, and rent a plane to drop them over your city.
You and your Moonie friends
get together and make a music video for the Sailor Moon theme song.
Your parents yell at you for
turning your light on and off during the night, and your excuse is you
kept on thinking of great YKYWTMSMW's.
You can make Moonies out of
people who have never even seen the show.
You have actually been to every
Sailor Moon web site that exist.
You drive your friends crazy
by reading them this entire YKYWTMSMW list.
You think that if the entire
police department started wearing... short skirts, big bows, and long white
gloves, they would catch more bad guys.
You do the 'Mina wave' whenever
you see your friends.
You watch your recorded tapes
of Sailor moon in slow motion just so it'll last longer.
Your parents wear earplugs all
the time, because you will not shut up about Sailor Moon.
Every time you see a link to
a new Sailor Moon web site, you simply have to check it out!